Travel is always an adventure. Sometimes a great adventure loaded with fun and unexpected delights, other times it’s a nightmare filled with aggravation and despair. I think our travel coordinator gets a thrill out finding how many different ways she can get us from point A to point B- and sometimes even points D, E and F.
Of course we take your standard means of transportation most of the time. Rental cars (actually usually mini vans), airplanes (all shapes and sizes), trains, and even boats.
Fortunately, someone out there invented rental car insurance! Darn good thing. I learned how to drift in a rental Nissan Altima. Did you know that a Dodge Charger handles just as well on grass as it does on gravel and dirt? Who knew? I had no idea you could get air in a minivan with 6 full grown men inside. I’m not sure if insurance covers a man in the trunk, but we do know that a man can fit and that the emergency release cord inside the truck functions properly! Not real sure what the folks thought who saw him pop out all on his own, but that’s for their therapist to decipher. By the way, just in case you were wondering, a 2012 Caravan does get a slight vibration around 95 MPH. Oh, and did you realize KIA still makes cars with window cranks? For those of you under 25 years old reading this- a window crank is what us old fogies used way back when to make the windows go up and down before they invented a button, or at least made the button standard equipment.
I hate to fly. It never used to bother me much, but for some reason over the last few years I’ve started to get very apprehensive about it. I can get really anxious on a flight. I’m not sure if it’s the lack of control I have over the plane itself or the height or just the knowledge of impending death if it bursts into flames or slams into a mountain. I do, for some reason find comfort flying over a large body of water- I still believe I have a chance of surviving if we hit water. May be in some part due to Captain Sully after he successfully crashed in the Hudson a few years back- at least I think that’s how it went. Again, someone way smarter than me (or is it I?), had the foresight to make in-flight adult beverages available. A scotch or bourbon usually calms my nerves, unless I wind up on a small prop plane….
A few years ago we had a camp scheduled in a small town in Nebraska. No big deal, I’ve been to plenty of small towns. Our travel coordinator gives us our itinerary and we were off. The flight into Denver was uneventful- which is how I like them! We found our way to our terminal and gate for the next leg of the trip only to look out on the tarmac and see nothing but small twin engine prop planes. Well, I just knew we were in the wrong place, because there was no way I would be booked on a plane that small. Much less booked and that little detail undisclosed. But, as it turns out, we were in the right place and that was to be our mode of transportation from Denver to Grand Island. There were 8 of us coaches total on this flight. I have to admit it was kind of cool to get on the plane and find out it was just our party. Absolutely no other passengers! That excitement didn’t last long though when we realized the 8 of us barely fit and the captain was also the flight attendant. After he shuffled us around to get the weight distribution to his liking, I looked back at my cohorts. I don’t think I will ever forget some of the looks I saw. There was pure terror on one face, one was already asleep, a couple were smiling, the rest looked extremely….concerned. I think concerned is probably the right the word. Despite all that, the flight was seamless (much better than the one I had the next year! I boarded 3 different planes before they found one they liked!).
Now, the flight back was a little hairy. Flying back into Denver was a little dicey as far as I’m concerned. I was sitting up front and could see right out the windshield. Having that vantage point, I could clearly see that we were approaching the runway at an awkward angle- I mean we were coming at the runway almost sideways! That coupled with the wind had us bouncing up and down and left and right, but I still knew were coming in sideways. Even though I was sweating, I looked at the two pilots/flight attendants and they seemed A-OK. That gave me some comfort, until I looked behind me and saw wide eyes staring back at me as his head was shaking back and forth. That confirmed it for me- definitely coming in sideways! I’m surprised the arm rests are still attached to my seat. I never really knew what people meant when they referred to “white knuckles”….I do now! Still, no concern on the faces of the men in charge as we got closer to the ground and the runway…still sideways. I’m sure in some small circles what happened next would be described as a “thing of beauty”.
I had already made peace with myself and knew this was the end, but I still couldn’t look away. Just like that, right before we touched down, that brilliant pilot/flight attendant spun that plane around straight ahead and dropped us down pretty as you please! For the record, I had to make that same flight the following summer, but if I never get on another one I will be just fine.
Trains are a common way to travel, especially in bigger cities and in the Northeast. I admit, I am an inexperienced train traveler. Nevertheless, our trusty travel coordinator booked four of us on a train from someplace in Connecticut to Philadelphia. She explained we would have a good time and that it was much, much cheaper than a plane (which by now you know I’m not fond of). We found ourselves at the train station several hours before our train was to depart. This due in part to the fact that hotel check out times and departure times don’t always mesh. As is customary after we complete a camp, there is some celebrating to be done. Some celebrate quite a bit more than others and they find themselves asleep on a bench inside the train station, while the rest find some greasy food and hair of the dog at a nearby watering hole. I do want to state for the record that we left a note on our friend asleep on the bench along with a bottle of water. That really didn’t help when the train police came through. They informed him that sleeping there was not permitted for any reason!
Eventually, we did board the train. We had to split up and find seats, so two of us went toward the front and 2 of us stayed near the rear. My companion and I found a couple seats together and settled in. The train departed and we just began talking about nothing general when a sweet little old lady tapped me on the shoulder. I figured she needed help with a bag or maybe dropped something under my seat. Not this lady! She went into a rant about how we were in the “Quiet” car and had no respect for any of the other passengers. I apologized and tried to explain that I had no idea we had violated train laws.
We left the “Quiet” car and began to look for another place to sit when we ran into a young lady traveling back home from visiting her boyfriend. Evidently, she had done some celebrating too! The three of us found the dining car. There were no places to sit there either, so we just stood at the bar and ordered a beer and something to snack on. We made small talk and were just wasting time when a porter walked into the car. Our new friend (I don’t remember her name), decided it would be fun to take his hat and try it on. She also thought it would be fun to pose for pictures with the hat on. The porter was a good sport for the first few minutes, but quickly became agitated and was adamant that she return his hat. She did, no harm , no foul…until, she began to try and make everyone in the dining car participate in a sing along. No good sports here- she was only met with sneers and snickers and disgust. We thought it was pretty funny, she thought it was hilarious, the train people found no humor in it and told me if I didn’t get her to calm down then we would all be put off at the next stop! It took some convincing, but I finally got them to understand we didn’t even know this woman, much less travel with her. Unfortunately, she was put off at the next stop, and the rest of the trip was fairly tame from there.
If you’ve ever been to the Charlotte, NC area, hopefully you have seen beautiful Lake Norman. Four years ago we decided that a mid-camp season lake trip would become tradition. We began in Lake Grapevine in Texas then the following year scheduled it for Lake Norman, which also happens to be near some of my family. Two birds with one stone thing, get to have some fun and visit with family at the same time. I set us up to go rent a pontoon boat for the day, stocked up on drinks and food and sunscreen. Now, most pontoons I’ve rented come with very small outboard motors and this one was no exception. I think it was only 25-30 HP, so we weren’t going anywhere in a hurry. We get everyone on the boat, go through the checklist and all the safety concerns with the dock personnel then set out. We were to meet my cousin in a cove around the corner from Tony Stewart’s house boat! After what seemed like hours, we finally find them in the cove, we tie up with them and throw out the anchor. Time to cool off and have some fun! I jumped right in…along with my phone, wallet, and anything else I forgot to take out of my pocket! So now I’m the butt of everyone’s jokes, but who cares? I’m on the lake and having fun! In fact, we are all having a lot of fun when my cousin looks up and says a storm has just blown in and they are heading into the dock. No kidding, temperature dropped, sky turned black and the wind picked up in a matter of seconds! We couldn’t get packed up and back to dock in time to avoid the impending storm. Not with a 25 HP motor! I gave it everything it had and hit the main lake.
There were boats everywhere! We saw some hit each other and we almost got side swiped! The waves were picking up- some came over the rails of the pontoon boat (that’s probably 4-5 feet out of the water). Our travel coordinator was with us and taking pictures to help immortalize the event when a wave came over the side and knocked her down and the camera out of her hand. We saved the camera, or at least the memory card inside. Our boat was so slow, especially going into the wind that we had to stop a couple times for bathroom breaks! Several rescue boats sped right by us on their way to who knows what. By the time we got back to the dock the storm had subsided, but were all drenched from head to toe, shivering and ready to get back into warm dry clothes! I found out later that as my cousin approached the dock there was a line of boats waiting to be dry docked. They went right by them to the front of the line as everyone else cursed and shouted.
Her only remark was this: “I have children and a dog, we trump you!”
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